FOR KJV ONLY LOVERS

(The following selection is for the benefit of our KJV readers who contend that this version is the best and that the terms in it can be easily understood by the average person. Read over the following and see if you can understand the meaning. RH)

Mingled people (Jer. 25:20) from the nethermost (1 Kings 6:6) ate snuffdishes (Ex. 25:38) and palmerworm (Joel 1:4) every quarternion (Acts 12:4). Their sheepcote (2 Sam. 7:8) were in shambles (1 Cor. 10:25). Naught (Prov. 20:14) to worry. We outwent (Mk. 6:33) to bewray (Isa. 16:3) the breeches (Ex. 28:42) with putrifying sores (Isa. 1:6) on the sackbut (Dan 3:5).

Beeves (Lev. 22:19) armholes (Jer. 38:12) and emerods (Deut. 28:27) canker (2 Tim. 2:17) the bald locust (Lev. 11:22) before horseleach (Prov. 30:15) broilered (Ex. 28:4) the calves of our lips (Hos. 14:2) and cast the same in his teeth (Mt. 27:44) burning ague (Lev. 26:16) and chalkstones (Isa. 27:9)! Besom (Isa. 14:23) liers (Josh. 8:14) girt (2 Kings 1:8) the hasty fruit (Isa. 28:4) while lapwing (Lev. 11:19) helve (Deut. 19:5) the hindmost (Num. 2:31) apothecary (Ex. 30:25). The ambushment (2 Chron. 13:13) cauls (Isa. 3:18) chapiter (1 Kings 7:16) from ambassage (Lk. 14:32) and his flesh pots (Ex. 16:3) freckled spot (Lev. 13:39) the mallows (Job 30:4). Then nergal (2 Kings 17:30) mufflers (Isa. 3:19) astonied (Ezra 9:4) the farthing (Mt. 5:26) flagons (Isa. 22:24) mincing (Isa. 3:16) mete (Ex. 16:18), maw (Deut. 18:3) and assupim (1 Chron. 26:15). Afterwards the college (2 Kings 22:14) oil tree (Isa. 41:19) was neesings (Job 41:18), plaiting (1 Pet. 3:3) pleasant plants (Isa. 17:10) and rereward (Number 10:25) ribband (Num. 15:38).

Moreover, the portray (Ezek. 4:1) bloody flux (Acts 28:8) botch (Deut. 28:27) his ossifrage (Lev. 11:13) while the pommels (2 Chron. 4:12) pygarg (Deut. 14:5) his victual (Ex. 12:39). Waxed rich (Rev. 18:3) caused a tender eyed (Gen. 29:17) unicorn (Numbers 23:22) to spikenard (Mark 14:3) the sabaoth (Rom. 9:29) the same time a cankerworm (Joel 1:4) cheek teeth (Joel 1:6) the exactors (Isa. 60:17). But that’s not all! The crisping pins (Isa. 3:22) fell out of the chamois (Dt. 14:5) fray (Jer. 7:33) engines (Ezek. 26:9) and succour (Heb. 2:18) the malefactor (John 18:30) into the lily work (1 Kings 7:19)!

For those who think this is but succothbenoth (2 Kings 17:30), vain janglings (1 Tim. 1:6) and superfluity of naughtiness (James 1:21), winefat (Isa. 63:2) and wist (Joshua 8:14) will unstopped (Isa. 35:5). Trow (Luke 17:9) the wreathen (Ex. 28:14) and gay clothing (James 2:3) over the clift (Ex. 33:32) and churl (Isa. 32:5) the checker work (1 Kings 7:17) down the firepans (2 Kings 25:15) and on hungerbitten (Job 18:12) hoar frost (Ex. 16:14). The latchet (Mark 1:7) to the lowering (Mt. 16:3) has occurrent (1 Kings 5:4) and even munition (Isa. 29:7). The mortar (Num. 11:8) pavement (Esther 1:6) is below the almug (1 Kings 10:12) and pressfat (Hag. 2:16) the sheaf (Gen. 37:7). Understandeth what thou readeth?